Letting Go of "Survival Mode"

Adjusting 
When our old self had grown up living in "survival mode" with abusive parents, it may at first be hard to adjust to a life where there's no abuse. By this I mean, the mind and the body remember the trauma that was faced and the fear associated with it as well as the defense mechanisms. But now after you've cut ties with and left your family, you are in an entirely new environment and don't need to worry about being abused. However, you still find yourself in that mental state of "what if?" As if you still need to be paranoid about it or be prepared and cautious in case it ever happens again. This is something that you must let go of and shift your mindset to being oriented to receiving love from others and expecting it. Though you know you don't tolerate abuse, it's also important to learn to live without the fear of it. 

Truth: You have to look at the past abuse as something to let go of and never to be faced again. 

Letting Go
It's gone. Forever. That's not the way God intended you to be treated and He delivered you. You're not going back to Egypt. Your marching on your way to eternal life with God. Let go of those fearful ways of living and start to smell the flowers, forgetting that past and embracing the goodness that God has in store for you to enjoy. You don't walk on eggshells anymore. You're free. 

Reflections from Cognitive Behavioral Therapy: Peaceful, Graceful, and Confidently Me

Reflection 
1) I was having all or nothing thinking about possible future mistakes because I had deep trauma from condemnation in the past. 
2) I was judging myself based on feelings rather than having compassion, grace, and patience for myself due to past trauma needing to be healed. 
3) I was labeling myself as a loser for how I thought others would see me for not receiving my mom's love. 

Identifying Cognitive Distortions 
1) All or nothing thinking based on condemnation from past trauma 
2) Critical judgements on myself based on current feelings rather than having compassion, patience, and grace for myself 
3) Labeling myself based on how others might see me for not receiving something rather than seeing myself based on how God sees me 

My Thoughts Now 
1) I can make future decisions without fear of condemnation and have grace for myself
2) When I have unwanted feelings, instead of being overly critical towards myself, I can have compassion, patience, and grace trusting that God will heal me in His timing and justify me 
3) Instead of focusing on how others would see me for not receiving my parents' love, I can stand in strength and dignity knowing that my confidence comes from who God is to me and who I am in Him. I lack nothing. 

The Truth
1) The past doesn't repeat itself when I walk by grace 
2) God doesn't see me according to my sins 
3) The truth of God is more important than other people's opinions 

How I Feel Now
1) Peaceful about the future 
2) Graceful about the present 
3) Confidently me forever 

Prayer: God, thank you for transforming and healing me. Your forgiveness is powerful. Please help me to rely on Your grace and Your justification every step of the way for the rest of my life and not be self-righteous and legalistic with myself in Jesus name Amen. 

Truth: I have moved on from the past by God's grace. I am set free . . . I can trust again. 

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